this is the sound of a broken heart beating.

You leave your troubles at the door
I feel we don’t know what we’re fighting for
Feels like I’m a prisoner baby
So hard when you have to fake it
It hurts so much to feel love
When you know you’ve got to break it

Omg the wonders of webcam. I seem to relish the joy of it. Think about it makes me sexcited. Hahaha wtf.

I got into an accident at work on sunday. Was holding 4 ceramic cups and attempting to open the rubbish bin cover. I dont know man but it was slippery and somehow i fell forward WITH the cups in my hands and there we go, shumin gets a 2 cm long cut that is deep enough to require stitching at the A&E.

I dont know how i handled going to the clinic by train with everyone moshing and aggravating the condition. No la im exaggerating.
But i still went to the clinic by train, thats a fact for sure.
The doctor at the clinic is bloody hot. Too bad he had a mask on. Scully take out mask only..
Hot doctor: “oh no.. this is very deep. i cant do anything for you here. you have to go to the A&E.”
My mother: “HUH HAVE TO GO TAN TOCK SENG AH”
Me: “wtf lah you think singapore only one hospital ah everytime also tan tock seng tan tock seng.”

The other time we had a gas explosion in the house and she went tan tock seng. The nearest hospital was KK hospital. You get my point -.-

I was in the cab telling my mom how the hot doctor at the bedok clinic relieved my pain. She told me girls cannot keep gushing over guys cause it defys human nature.
Okay she actually called me crazy.

I waited 2 hours at changi general hospital to get the stitching done. Not too bad considering jelly mao mao (my ex) took bloody 6 hours just to get his right elbow relocated back to the right socket.

(In the operation theatre)
Doctor: I’m going to give you some local anesthesia so that you dont feel the pain.
Me:[trembling in intense fear/cold. idk which one] okay.
While he was stitching,
Me: Doctor ah, am i uh like suppose to feel the pain? cause like i can actually feel you know.
Doctor: Yeah you’re suppose to feel pain, but it is reduced of course.

Wtf then what is the anesthesia for. I felt like as though the doctor was using my skin as fabric then he’s just sewing happily. Oh god. And he didnt give me any prescription or follow up.
Oh well, the doctor is duck-feet and usually people who have duck feet get angry easily so i daren’t demand for explainations lest he gives me 5 sedative jabs.

So now i’ve got ugly hands and  no one is gonna marry me cause i got ugly hands. Life is great, life is free.

01.34AM

I got my results.
I prayed once; god please let me get into nursing. Tolong lah tolong. I see blood everyday also never mind one you know. Better than i watch tv at home everyday and waste my life away.

God was kind. He gave me 15 point for L1R4. After minusing CCA points.
Now i’m stranded. Poly doesn’t bloody use cca points so i got like 17 points? Neither good or bad. Wtf.
Should i take a gamble and try out for veterinary bioscience or what. Suck.
But nonetheless i still appreciate the brains god gave me. People mugging, i watching tv. Damn, if only i really studied.

Baby i’m bad news.

Stay alive

Jesus. Internet feels good, smells good, sound good, tastes good. I feel immortalised currently. I’m finally capable of doing what everyone says “BUY THE DRESS ONLINE LAH!” Fuck im fucking happy cause like o’s are over and im going to thailand and im going out with jelly everyday without people complaining. I DESERVE THIS. However the unfortunate news is i got fucking flu and sore throat right now and the ENO drink that jelly mao mao gave me isn’t working exactly. I’m going to beat him up now and force his dog to play dead 24/7. BYE. YOU ALL WILL HEAR ME SOON. SOON ENOUGH. And this would probably be the last class photo ever. I love you 4/5. *sobs uncontrollably*

I’d like to make myself believe.

Purr

Me: *sees 2 filipino maids and two bangalah* Wtf nowadays all the maid date bangalah one. I bloody see them everywhere, EVERYWHERE!
Gary: Hahah yeah.
Me: So much for foreign talent.
Gary: … *LOL*

Utterly distubring.

I night you told me that you were all alone,
I tried to call you but you were on the phone.
You thought you told me that you were by yourself?
I dont believe you, you are with somebody else.

I feel like singing disturbia now. Seriously. I just had my socials studies paper. I swear it was suicidal for even attempting to do it. I am disturbed i am disturbed. I’m so gonna walk into the friday night traffic in town and get lang-gah by all the cars if i fail. Tsk i didnt even study wtf. They should not be playing harry potter in the evenings lah wtf.

I was trying to study but my study table is like just beside the tv. All i have to do is press a button and crane my neck, then i’ll get to watch Harry Pot’er FOR FREE. Cheebs. I wish my tv would explode like how it did 2 years ago. HAHAH burn in hell.

Dont accept critique or credit.

Stand on up
Everyone you kill
We’ve got to stare on out
Don’t get sucked in for a second
Robots might say your name
They only light the stage
Nothing there to prove

 

For this past two weeks all i’ve been doing (most of the time) is staying at home walking tv and the only excercise i got is lifting my hands to switch the tv channels. My mother should never have moved house. And its relatively ridiculous to move a street down. Technically 1 street down cause i use to live in BN street 3 but now its street 2. Queer i know.

I feel like a sloth. At least people my age are mugging for o levels and other national exams but jesus, look at me, all i do is watch tv and remembering who is trying to kill who and show timings.

I’m glad school is reopening but at the same time i was hoping the so called CNA vote- for extended holidays would be like you know a success kind of thing. But le sigh no we’re not getting any shit. I hope someone from my school kena H1N1 *cues in evil laughter*

When i had to go to the polyclinic the other day, there were people at the entrance to take your temperature and all. Funny how they have to get all gear up with mask and cloak and all. Wtf and they appear pretty uh, you know, good looking. Pity the mask has to cover their mouth. Oh and nose too. So maybe they have nice eyes and hair but for all you know, they has giant nostrils and mouths like hahahah, you know.

A couple of photos for show and off i go-

He ain’t smelly, he’s my brother. HAHAHA. No lah he’s my boyfriend.

My mother would say ” WAH LER EH BIN TERNG TERNG XIANG BEH.” Meaning your face long long like horse. But im damn sure its not as horse-like compared to jelly’s.

Another day-

One of the rare days when we actually get to go to town. God.

And sindy’s birthday-

And life’s a beach-

Yeah so now you know my life’s a beach. Hahahah.

Pandemic!

We were having biology and suddenly the cher was like “You all know singapore got their first case of H1N1 already?”
As usual i got the biggest reaction, complete with the shocked face- eyes twice its normal size and the loudest HUH you can hear.
Sweet baby Jesus, i cant believe we got our first H1N1 but actually im kinda excited for it to like spread. So we’ll have no school. Sexcellent. Damn sexcellent. Omg im getting excited now.

I know i’ve been missing from this space close to like 2 months now but i cant be bothered. Life is bleak and i hate my life. Sincerely.

At least we made it this far, and it all looks smooth from here.

You have given me a heart attack, you’ll never know,
What it’s like to face the fact you might let go.
Now I won’t stand for any thought of that, Heavens no.
‘Cause I will cling to you and always have a stronger hold.

Okay i’ll make this damn quick. My laptop is practically gone, smashed to i dont know what and okay basically its none relivable. When i on the laptop, the screen’s like (inserts stunned face), cracked to death. Reminds me of humpty dumpty. You know humpty dumpty is the fella that fell from the wall and couldn’t be put back together again that one yes that one. Alright side tracking. Main point is i wont be updating much about my mundane life but whatever, do you even care?

History repeated, but this time its more potent and i had to hibernate more than ever to keep myself alive *tunes into Alive for the first time* But thank god bobby was there. THANK GOD WTF. But mom you suck, you seriously suck. You didn’t give me allowance for 1 whole fucking week and i didn’t even give a fiddler’s fart about it you scold me for for fucking phone bills that you didn’t pay (and thus incurring the 200 bucks). This is not cool i need food i need money. But thank god there is bobby.

I can’t believe i wasted my whole holiday on choir, accounts and more choir. Choir is suffocating me so much i think i’d die of oxygen deprivation or something. Okay not funny at all wtf.

The other day when i was waiting for bobby to be done with his training (wtf sound like ultimate clingy girlfriend here but wah lao dont blame me i was forced), this personal trainer from the gym was having some kind of weight loss proposal for this malay guy, middle aged and all. Alright i eavesdropped on their conversation like fucking rude i know but eh it beats doing matrices for bloody an hour and a half. Plus their convo was so loud i could hear random words even when i blasted my music to the max.

The Personal Trainer (PT) told the guy all sorts of nonsense that are like ridiculous. The assurance of weight loss is definately there but the bloody practicality of it is wtf seriously. I was so bored i even jotted the “weight loss tips” into my maths textbook. Damn jia lat i know wtf.

Anyway the most prominient “tip” that i remembered from the proposal is this; THROW YOUR MICROWAVE AWAY. Wtf wtf wtf wtf! I was hyperventilating (in my heart) like zomg.
Well PT said, if you have any microwave, throw it away. The microwave’s intense causes the atoms of the food to vibrate like mad (think x 10000000) and thus changing the whole biological structure of the food. And when that happens, you eat the food, you’ll harm yourself or something. Haiyah something along that line lah. Right even if it changes the biological structure of the food its still food and its edible right? So no microwave will be okay lah?

LIDDAT INTENSE HEAT CAN EAT?

LIDDAT INTENSE HEAT CAN EAT?

Wtf its damn ridiculous i wanna throw the calculator and maths textbook at him. The guy still could go “yeah yeah definately.” Jesus grow them some brains.

The PT asked the guy; “Do you have anything that you like to touch?”
Guy: *silence*
PT: ” For example you know, silk? Its nice to touch.”
Guy: ” Oh yeah silk silk silk. Silk is nice”
PT: “Alrighttt.” *proceeds to jot down something in notebook*
Guy: ” Oh i like to touch woman’s body.”
PT + Guy: ” HAHAHAH OH YEAH YEAH..” *continues agreeing and laughing*
I started panicking for a while and wanted to run in to the training ground and find bob but they proceeded to some other thing. Wait lemme recall.

Oh PT asked the guy to drink just apple cider for 1 whole week. Confirm lose 7 pounds. He means drink apple cidar only, no food no nothing. Fuck sia like that must as well dont eat? Thats is called fucking harcore dieting not weight lossing scheme. Idiotic i felt like ordering macs then. I couldn’t accept the fact that the guy was agreeing to every single shit the PT was saying.

Tsk why am i not surprised? PT is a caucasian, and we are for suckers for whatever caucasians says. Anything the ang moh say only, okay okay. Fuck lah.

Sweet and i went sheesha twice or something in less than a week. I think we’re gonna die of bronchitis by 20. Wish me luck.

So much for making this fast -.-

I’m in love with you, are you in love with me too?

He bloomed me a garden of love.

Oh what the fuck baby we’ve been sheesha-ing for like the second time in less than 6 days. Hahah okay note to self; dont even think of going to bugis.
Walked and walked again. Well it would be cool if it wasn’t so humid and didnt cause us to perspire so much. What lah serious yesterday so hot then today so..

Met his friends, hilarious bunch of people. Uh you want a boyfriend you ask me lah kay? Alright just kidding but seriously if you do, ask me.

Damn my whole life seem to be revolving around him and school with message inbox all flooded by him. Power or what. I just hope he would be like this forever because if he doesn’t, it must be another one of my karmas. Sighsology.

Alright i have choir in less than an hour and i havent even bathed. Just woke up lah.

I look like i died here or something.

“Lemme sleep laahhhhh”

HI HI HI HI HI HAHAHAH.

Best photo so far, one fine day i’ll have a slr and you wont be spared hahah.

He decides that its his turn to sleep now.

Proof that my eyes are fucking small.

“Dowan take already lah.”

Attempted the killer stare…

But to no avail.

Yah lah cute lah cute lah

Okay here’s the deal, you listen to your metal, i listen to my sleeping songs. SET.

“Eh you look like you got big eyes here!”

I seriously thank god for you. I didnt even bother searching for one and somehow you just popped up in my life. I think i would never ever find anyone like you. Like what sia, you’re the first proper boyfriend? Oh god lets not revive the past. Anyway, i love you darling.